Unmasking the Domestic Abuser in the Church

Author: Jeff Crippen Page 53 of 88

Part 2 of An Appearance of Godliness is Published now at lightfordarktimes.com

An Appearance of Godliness: Case Studies in Evil (Part 2) is now published at Light for Dark Times. This is the series that you can help me turn into a book with your comments and experiences. Just comment or email me at swordtrowel@gmail.com

A Warning to Those who Harbor the Wicked

Jeremiah 7:5-8 ESV  “For if you truly amend your ways and your deeds, if you truly execute justice one with another,  (6)  if you do not oppress the sojourner, the fatherless, or the widow, or shed innocent blood in this place, and if you do not go after other gods to your own harm,  (7)  then I will let you dwell in this place, in the land that I gave of old to your fathers forever.  (8)  “Behold, you trust in deceptive words to no avail.

Listen to Matthew Henry’s comment on these verses. The underlining is mine:

Those that had power in their hands must thoroughly execute judgment between a man and his neighbor, without partiality, and according as the merits of the case appeared. They must not either in judgment or in contract oppress the stranger, the fatherless, or the widow, nor countenance or protect those that did oppress, nor refuse to do them justice when they sought for it. [Matthew Henry, Commentary on Jeremiah]

We all know that abusers and other evildoers work very hard to gather allies for themselves. And frankly, in local churches, they don’t have to work all that hard to accomplish this. We have firsthand testimony time after time after time of how a pastor, other church leaders, or church members did exactly what the Lord is commanding Jeremiah’s countrymen to repent of. They do countenance (approve) of these wicked people and protect them from judgment.

Some Common Sense from the Ananias and Sapphira Scripture

Acts 5:7-9 ESV  After an interval of about three hours his wife came in, not knowing what had happened.  (8)  And Peter said to her, “Tell me whether you sold the land for so much.” And she said, “Yes, for so much.”  (9)  But Peter said to her, “How is it that you have agreed together to test the Spirit of the Lord? Behold, the feet of those who have buried your husband are at the door, and they will carry you out.”

A wise lady sent me the following observations about this account of Ananias and Sapphira and their sin and what it tells us about this widespread oppressive teaching in churches that a wife is to “respect” her husband by remaining silent even when he is wicked:

Isn’t it interesting that Ananias AND Sapphira were questioned separately? So if she was not supposed to hide the truth about their joint decision…why should a wife have to keep hiding the truth about what the husband is really like behind closed doors? If he treated a co-worker the same it would be seen as  verbal harassment and assault. Both have safeguards under the law. Therefore when a woman comes forward she is doing the right thing by saying her husband is actually committing a crime against her. I think this is why the Christian witness before the world is so odious on this topic. It defies common sense that we would encourage a woman to stay in a situation where crimes are continuously committed against her. How is that showing the love of Christ before the world?

I think that says it all.

Watch Out for this Leaven – It has Permeated the Visible Church

I received this email from a friend this morning and am very thankful to her for taking the time to write and point out a prevailing false teaching that is soooo commonly pushed in churches. This stuff will guilt and demean and it can sound so “biblical.”  The screenshots she mentions follow below and then my reply to her after that.

Dear Pastor Crippen,
Every morning we get an email devotional from the Institute for Creation Research. I am sending two screen shots of the devotional this morning. I was quite shocked to read the commentary. I thought it would be of interest to you. The passage that is mentioned has always been confusing to me but the interpretation given here makes it sound like women remain under “a sentence.”  That doesn’t make sense since I know Jesus redeemed me and freed me from the curse of the law. He paid for it all. I would love to hear your commentary on this passage.
Thank you for fulfilling your calling. I have written before but will say it again- your ministry is literally saving lives.
A concerned friend in Christ,

Here is the devotional that she sent. As she mentioned it is put out by the Institute for Creation Research.

Announcing a New Series – Want to Help me write a book?

This post was published this morning at my other blog, lightfordarktimes.com, but I am also publishing it here at Unholy Charade because I would really like all of you to see it. If you haven’t followed LFDT’s yet, please go there and sign on to follow. This post is the first in a series which will become a book and…well, here it is and I explain what this series is for – [I will just publish this first post in the series here at Unholy Charade. The rest will appear each Friday at LFDT’s] –
I have the outline of a new book sitting here on my desk, which I never seem to have time to get started on. So I thought what I would do is write it here with a weekly installment, and have you all provide your observations and comments and thereby…help me write the book!
Here is the central theme scripture the book title is drawn from and which is really a statement of the purpose of the book:

2 Timothy 3:1-5 ESV  But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty.  (2)  For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy,  (3)  heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good,  (4)  treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,  (5)  having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Avoid such people.

Most all of the wicked people I have had to deal with as a pastor, in the church, were this very kind of person. They had the appearance of godliness, but they denied its power. Let’s see if we can think through what this means.

More Wisdom About the Wicked

I found this quote in an old commentary on the book of Jeremiah:

The most wicked, we know, flatter themselves while they can retain the good opinion and applause of the world; and as long as they continue in honor, they slumber in their vices.

The author continues:

…though hypocrites flatter themselves, and the whole world enourages them by its adulations [applause] all this will not avail them; for they must at last come before the tribunal of God and that before God truth only will be approved and honored.

The particular kind of wicked person we deal with here – the domestic abuser (including the narcissist, sociopath, and psychopath) fits this description quite well. Evil people flatter themselves that they are quite right with God. They boast about what fine saints they are. They quote Bible verses left and right. And what encourages them to be able to “slumber in their vices,” un-troubled by conscience, is that they are receiving the praise, applause, and adulation of the world, including that of worldly churches.

Watch Out for the Usual Suspects

I suppose that you get email advertisements from various Christian vendors and organizations like I do.  Here is one that just came announcing a book and a DVD series on the church:

That isn’t the greatest resolution on the picture so I don’t know how well you can read it. What I wanted to emphasize and warn you about is what I call “the usual suspects.” The evangelical church and associated organizations almost always utilize their “go to” people. Whether it be a conference or a new book that needs endorsing or some teaching series like this one, you can be sure that the list of “speakers” and authors will include the same names over and over and over. This in itself is a danger because far too many Christians consider what these people say to be “gospel.” Often it isn’t.

CRC Worship Session Begins this Evening at 7PM


The CRC Worship Sessions begin tomorrow, Wednesday, at 7:00 PM (PST). Each week Kevin Dirks will be leading the livestream session on our FaceBook Page.  
Wednesday mornings we will post the Scripture reading and the words to the song selections here on our Light for Dark Times blog, so you have access to the words to print or to use to follow along.
A BIT ABOUT KEVIN – Kevin is the son-in-law of Pastor Jeff and Verla Crippen and lives in Victoria, BC. Kevin was a pastor when their daughter first met him and has been leading the worship portion of the Sunday services at a church in Victoria for a number of years. Kevin and Jenny have recently joined CRC “virtually”.
We are excited! Hope you can join us! And Thank you, Kevin!

Blind Leading the Blind – Don't be led by them

Luke 11:33-36 ESV  “No one after lighting a lamp puts it in a cellar or under a basket, but on a stand, so that those who enter may see the light.  (34)  Your eye is the lamp of your body. When your eye is healthy, your whole body is full of light, but when it is bad, your body is full of darkness.  (35)  Therefore be careful lest the light in you be darkness.  (36)  If then your whole body is full of light, having no part dark, it will be wholly bright, as when a lamp with its rays gives you light.”

These verses have always been hard to understand, even though we all sang “this little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine” in Sunday School as children. That happens often by the way – children being taught songs and memory verses and so on without being helped to understand the meaning. And I maintain that children can indeed be taught quite deeper truths than we think. But then, that is another subject.
Jesus said “your eye is the lamp of your body.” You have to have a good eye or your body is going to wander around in the dark stubbing toes and so on.
Then Jesus moved to the real point here. He said, “therefore be careful lest the light in you be darkness.” What did He mean? I can tell you.

The Domestic Abuser is Actually a Kidnapper and the Lord Will Treat him as Such

Exodus 21:16 ESV  “Whoever steals a man and sells him, and anyone found in possession of him, shall be put to death.
Deuteronomy 24:7 ESV  “If a man is found stealing one of his brothers of the people of Israel, and if he treats him as a slave or sells him, then that thief shall die. So you shall purge the evil from your midst.
1 Timothy 1:9-10 ESV  understanding this, that the law is not laid down for the just but for the lawless and disobedient, for the ungodly and sinners, for the unholy and profane, for those who strike their fathers and mothers, for murderers,  (10)  the sexually immoral, men who practice homosexuality, enslavers, liars, perjurers, and whatever else is contrary to sound doctrine,

One of our commenters recently compared the domestic abuser to a kidnapper and an abuser-driven marriage “legalized kidnapping.” This is quite accurate. And if you want to know what God thinks about kidnappers, well, just read the verses above.
Here is the irony. Churches that preach “freedom in Christ,” end up supporting legalized kidnapping when they ally with an abuser and oppress the victim. They turn a blind eye to the fact that the abuser has enslaved his target, expends all kinds of energies and devices to keep her in that bondage, and in divorce court proceedings demands a ransom be paid for her freedom.
This is worth thinking about seriously. What will the Lord do, not only with the kidnapper, but with those who are his allies? I think we can have a pretty good idea.
 

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