Unmasking the Domestic Abuser in the Church

Tag: false guilt Page 1 of 2

Is it You, You Troubler of Israel?

When Ahab saw Elijah, Ahab said to him, “Is it you, you troubler of Israel?” And he answered, “I have not troubled Israel, but you have, and your father’s house, because you have abandoned the commandments of the LORD and followed the Baals. (1 Kings 18:17-18) Wicked King Ahab hated…

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Book Review: The Peacemaker — Peace at Any Cost?

The Peacemaker: A Biblical Guide to Resolving Personal Conflict by Ken Sande is no friend of abuse victims and has real potential to increase their suffering greatly.  This book has been in use for some years now (1991) and we have had reports of it creating havoc in abuse settings.…

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If A Victim Divorces Her Abuser, She is Going to Hell – Really?

Does that headline sound like a National Enquirer exaggeration?  I wish it were.  I want to give you a summary here of “loving Christian counsel” that was recently given to a victim of 25 years of abuse.  Intense, evil, destructive abuse directed against her and against her children.  It is…

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Exposing Sin and Evil is not Gossip

Many thanks to one of our readers for writing the following to us: It’s not called gossip once a wife’s murder is reported after many years of hidden domestic abuse, but it’s called gossip if she talks about it before her murder. It’s not called gossip when it is reported that…

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Saul – A Case Study in False Repentance

As anyone familiar with the mentality and tactics of the abuser knows, false repentance is a common ploy of such people.   They can be very convincing.  They have changed.  What they did was wrong, but they are finished with it forever.  If their victim will only forgive them, all will…

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Accusation by Abusers to Victims: "You Cannot Keep Friends"

For he grew up before him like a young plant, and like a root out of dry ground; he had no form or majesty that we should look at him, and no beauty that we should desire him. He was despised and rejected by men; a man of sorrows, and…

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Will We Justify Child-Sacrifice to Baal?

Psalms 106:37-38   They sacrificed their sons and their daughters to the demons; they poured out innocent blood, the blood of their sons and daughters, whom they sacrificed to the idols of Canaan, and the land was polluted with blood. The charge that Christians are sacrificing children to Baal (demons)…

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Many Times Teaching "Gossip" as a Sin is Designed to Hush up Abuse Victims

A friend emailed me and brought the following book to my attention. Ed Welch (who wrote the forward) is of course a bigwig in CCEF which I never recommend to anyone. I haven't read the book. Apparently there is also a video series of it that is being used by…

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Keep Your Accusation Radar Up — It Detects Abusers

I have written on this subject before,  but it comes around in my mind once again. Here is a fact that will serve you well in helping identify and defend against an abuser: Abusers are accusers. A normal, healthy, safe relationship is not characterized by accusations. If someone is regularly…

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Pastoral Care Has Its Limits and Must Allow for the Priesthood of the Believer+

One of the recurring themes we hear from Christians who are abuse victims/survivors is that when they went to their pastor or church for help, reporting the abuse, they were told that they must remain with their abuser or at most separate from him for a time, always working toward…

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