Unmasking the Domestic Abuser in the Church

Tag: identifying abusers Page 1 of 4

Abuse Without a Word — Nonverbal Abusive Communications

Let not those rejoice over me who are wrongfully my foes, and let not those wink the eye who hate me without cause. (Psa 35:19) A worthless person, a wicked man, goes about with crooked speech, winks with his eyes, signals with his feet, points with his finger, with perverted…

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What Does it Feel Like to Not be Believed?

One of the most important things we can do to help victims of abuse is believe them when they tell us what is going on behind the scenes. If you have been following this blog for a while, you have probably seen that we have been attacked by some pretty nasty types…

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We All Begin in Naivete About Evil — But We Must Not Stay There

 He also told them a parable: “Can a blind man lead a blind man? Will they not both fall into a pit?  (Luke 6:39) An abuse survivor made the following excellent comment:  I grew up very sheltered, I mean genuinely sheltered and protected in a godly Bible-believing home. And if…

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Anger Management is Not the Answer

A reader recently wrote and said that her ex, and abusive man for over two decades, insists that his only problem is anger.  He claims to be a Christian and is verbally repentant about his anger.  The only problem is that in the same breath that he “confesses” his anger,…

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Abusers Expose Themselves: Some Early Warning Signs to Watch for

This post is written mostly from personal experience. It addresses a topic that generally leads me to start talking to myself:  “Jeff, how could you have been so stupid? Why didn’t you realize what that person was a long, long time ago?” You know that kind of self-talk I bet.…

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He is Just the Nicest Man I’ve Ever Met — Beware the Charm of Evil

The sins of some people are conspicuous, going before them to judgment, but the sins of others appear later. So also good works are conspicuous, and even those that are not cannot remain hidden. (1 Timothy 5:24-25) One of the important things we do here at Unholy Charade is to…

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A Fresh Look at Evil and an Open Call to all who Teach on Marriage – Ephesians 6

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against…

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Twisted Theology Produces a Den of Abusers Parading as the church

With remarkable frequency we meet abuse victims, mostly Christians, who originally met their abuser in a local church. Or in a Christian college or similar setting. In the church! Why? How can this be? Well, the answer is not only that abusers are exceptionally deceptive, but churches far and wide…

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Wising Up to the Abuser's "Christian" Facade

2Th 3:1-2  Finally, brothers, pray for us, that the word of the Lord may speed ahead and be honored, as happened among you, and that we may be delivered from wicked and evil men. For not all have faith. Wicked and evil men. We need to be delivered from them.…

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How many Sins Are Required to Demonstrate that a "Christian" is not a Christian?

How can you know if a person who claims to be a Christian, isn’t? Does it take years of watching and testing and waiting? Nope. Not at all. Here you go: Whoever says he is in the light and hates his brother is still in darkness. Whoever loves his brother…

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