3Jn 1:9-10 I have written something to the church, but Diotrephes, who likes to put himself first, does not acknowledge our authority. (10) So if I come, I will bring up what he is doing, talking wicked nonsense against us. And not content with that, he refuses to welcome the brothers, and also stops those who want to and puts them out of the church.
I wanted to share some more excellent insights from Jonathan Edwards in his essay on Spiritual Pride. He precisely nails the mentality and behavior of what we call the RASN (reviler, abuser, sociopath, narcissist). Here are some quotes:
Another effect of spiritual pride is to make the subject of it assuming. It oftentimes makes it natural to persons so to act and speak as though in a special manner it belonged to them to be taken notice of and much regarded. It is very natural to a person that is much under the influence of spiritual pride, to take all the respect that is paid him. If others show a disposition to submit to him, and yield him the deference of a teacher or headmaster, he is open to it and freely admits it. In fact it is natural to him to expect such treatment, and to take much notice if he fails of it, and to have an ill opinion of others that do not pay him that which he looks upon as his prerogative.The Works of Jonathan Edwards, Vol 1 p 402, Banner of Truth Trust
Edwards obviously had the unpleasant experience of dealing with these kind and he describes them perfectly. RASNs expect to be worshipped and exalted. They lust for this adoration and if anyone dare not bow down to their image, the RASN will hold such people in contempt.
Here is another quote:
A person who is under the influence of spiritual pride is more apt to instruct others, than to inquire for himself, and naturally puts on the airs of a master….As spiritual pride disposes persons to assume much to themselves, so it also disposes them to treat others with neglect.Ibid
The RASN is, as is often put, a “know-it-all.” You cannot tell them anything. They will tell YOU, and they do not characteristically ask about YOU. They talk about themselves.
These infernal qualities are red flags, warnings which we should recognize and not ignore. The person filled with this pride is not a safe person. A relationship with them will certainly be toxic and end in much harm and pain.