Unmasking the Domestic Abuser in the Church

Enablers as Flying Monkeys

Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers; but his delight is in the law of the LORD, and on his law he meditates day and night. (Psalms 1:1-2)

Recently I watched a video from Dr. Les Carter in which he discussed this very subject. You remember the flying monkeys in the Wizard of Oz? They were servants of the wicked witch who flew out to do her bidding. They provide a clear example of how enablers and allies of RASNs (revilers, abusers, sociopaths, narcissists) function in the very same way.

Flying monkeys “walk, stand, and sit” in the seat of RASNs, as the Psalmist would agree. Instead of separating from this evil, they remain in company with them. They maintain friendships with them. And they, on a spectrum from naivety to willing participation (the latter indicating that they are a type of RASN themselves), carry out the desires of the wicked witch. Those desires are of course the persecution of targeted victims.

We can all be duped by a RASN. Most of us have been duped by a RASN. They are deceptive in their evil goals and methods. But once the real nature of a RASN becomes obvious to us, we walk away. We break it off. We won’t be deceived or used by them any longer. We stand with the victim. Flying monkeys don’t. They remain in the service of the witch. These kind have crossed over from ignorance into the realm of willful alliance. And, as I said, on some kind of a spectrum, these allies share in the qualities of RASN-hood. The longer a person remains in a role of flying monkey, the closer and closer they morph into the dark character of the RASN themselves.

In my 41 years now as a pastor, I have been faced many times with having to deal with RASNs. Evil people who, like Diotrephes (see 3 John) crave to be first. To have power and control. People who use wicked tactics to achieve their wicked ends. In all of these times of needing to confront this kind of evil, there have always been flying monkeys. People who refuse to separate from the RASN. Who ally with them. Why? Because they will not pay the price of that separation. They will not come out from among the wicked and, like Moses, choose to suffer persecution and loss rather than being a winged ape.

Why do you not understand what I say? It is because you cannot bear to hear my word. You are of your father the devil, and your will is to do your father’s desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks out of his own character, for he is a liar and the father of lies. (John 8:43-44)

This is what a flying monkey does. Their desire is to do the will of the RASN, which ultimately is the will of the devil. To do otherwise, to choose the narrow way of righteousness, is too hard, too costly for them. Reputation, money, image, comfort – like the rich young ruler, they walk away from Jesus and from eternal life rather than give these things up. There is a cost to be paid when we refuse to stand with the witch any longer. But then, to remain – what is that cost? A steep price indeed – one’s soul, an exchange of heaven for hell.

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4 Comments

  1. Sarah

    Thank you for sharing this. The flying monkeys are more hurtful in facing sometimes. Betraying and abandoning you when you need them the most

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  2. Kyle

    Thank you so much for this article. The influence of a RASN is toxic, incredibly dangerous and highly contagious. Makes COVID look like the sniffles. Our Heavenly Father will hold us very accountable for enabling and not contending with sin in a brothers or sister.
    KJ

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  3. Tracey

    Sometimes this is a hard truth to face. I don’t want to believe it especially when it comes to my family. These scripture are comforting as all truth is. Yes we face loss, as these people tell us who they really are and who they serve. I pray Jesus for the strength to let them all go. Some I have but some still painfully remain. God is always faithful as these people never are.

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    • sojourner

      i understand how you feel Tracey, at least in part. I’ve been facing this crossroads for some time with a younger sibling, who it appears has finally sided with evil. I heard a quote recently that helped me, it was “Half safe people, are not safe.” it kind of helped me to distill the matter in my heart. We can pray God opens their eyes, and pray for their salvation from a safe distance, but thank God for the unfailing arms and love of Jesus to carry us through these perilous times. He is always a Hundred percent safe. I pray you find peace in your situation, and God Bless.

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