We just posted an article by Jimmy Hinton in which he takes on the “Caring Well” Southern Baptist group for continuing to endanger abuse victims by welcoming wolves in amongst the flock. Here is some follow up info in case you need more evidence.
The link below will take you to the Caring Well page where the 12 video lessons are posted for training. Take a look at the names of the authors on each of the lessons. Chris Moles, Leslie Vernick, Diane Langberg and others. These are people that seem to be the “go to” names for expert insight into abuse in the church. It boggles my mind that they could come up with such material.
And notice in particular lesson 10 where we call all learn how to reform a wolf and welcome him right into the pews (respecting his privacy you know, so the church as a whole isn’t told about him). If you don’t want to watch the video, Hinton’s article has a good portion of the content printed out for you to read. Caring Well? Yeah, right.
Caring Well
GypsyAngel
Not caring well at all. And unfortunately many do see these people as the experts. However, they are teaching things that go against scripture as well as TELLING church elders and pastors to lie! How is that appropriate? But then it isn’t, or we would not be having this discussion . Yikes.
no one down here
Did not listen to lesson 10. Tried lesson 9 with some highly unpleasant ptsd symptoms happening (Lesson 9 = telling the difference between criminal and non-criminal abuse, and what to do about the non-criminal abuse).
knowing that the abuser is a master of making everyone think that he is actually a victim…
knowing that he is a master manipulator… and a master liar
When the abuser starts to give the verbiage of “she is actually also at fault,” making him the victim… how can that be seen as “repentance” worthy of reconciliation? How is that really holding his feet to the fire? How is that really proving that marriage counseling should now start? Since individual counseling didn’t work, how is marriage counseling going to work? Oh, I forgot … because the victim is actually responsible for his abuse… so marriage counseling will allow you to address the victim’s failures. Success = her agreeing that she was at fault, asking mutual forgiveness and going back to the abusive situation.
I am not convinced that there is any support for someone who experienced such horrendous abuse of a “marriage” breakdown that started within the first couple months after the wedding and culminated with a massive power/control issue happening.
I’m not convinced that they understand (statistically speaking) that while some abusers might actually change, the percentage of abusers that change is at best 1-2%, and that for that tiny percentage, change comes at a difficult price for the abuser. Sure … have your program. But go into it with the expectation of “failure,” not success.
Jeff Crippen
And in the process of their “program” they confuse and traumatize victims.
GISB
My former pastor (I say this with distain — he cheated on his wife, left ministry, repented publicly, was welcomed back into the fold, then started teaching young married couples on the dangers of lust and cheating ,then cheated on his wife again) referred me to Leslie Vernik’s YouTube channel. After only ONE video, I was so disgusted with her teachings I never viewed another. Only now, years later, after a brutal divorce from the ex narc, do I understand she too is a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Thank you, Pastor Jeff, for all you do for us in this community. Your books literally helped heal my soul.