Unmasking the Domestic Abuser in the Church

Why Does Your Abuser Hate You?

Therefore God sends them a strong delusion, so that they may believe what is false, in order that all may be condemned who did not believe the truth but had pleasure in unrighteousness. (2Th 2:11-12)

Have you ever spent time wondering…why does that RASN in my life hate me? Domestic abuse victims often try and try and try to please. To make peace. To overlook. But nothing seems to work. The anger and abuse and evil tactics just keep coming at them. Why?

I believe that the verses quoted above provide a good share of the answer. RASNs (revilers, abusers, sociopaths, narcissists) despise truth. Truth exposes and a narcissist, for instance, is constantly at work fighting against being exposed for their true self. This is why the Pharisees hated Jesus, for instance. He was Light and He exposed what they really were – children of the devil in a saint’s disguise.

When a person persists in hardening their heart against God’s truth, there comes a point when the Lord hands them over to what Paul calls a “strong delusion.” RASNs are delusional. They believe what is false and reject what is true. They took pleasure in wickedness, and so the Lord gives them over to the power of the devil and their own sin. You cannot reason with a delusional person. What they believe about themselves (grandiosity) is part of the delusion, as is what they think about you. They believe, in their delusional mind, that your function is to flatter them, feed their ego, and serve them, propping up their false self-image. You are a lowlife in other words. They hold you in contempt.

I have never yet, in all my 41 years as a pastor, seen one of these kind repent and turn, returning to a sound mind. Never. When people put on a false show of Christianity, thus mocking God, the time comes when He says, “enough!” The strong delusion sweeps over their mind so that they cannot believe the truth. Why? Because it is God’s resolve to condemn them.

And that largely explains why a RASN hates their targeted victim. Particularly if that victim is a Christian.

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2 Comments

  1. JS23

    I lived this nightmare all my life, even after my father died. I can tell you this he fooled many people. I was the target because I spoke the truth.

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  2. Cy

    My RASN would frequently accuse me of thinking he was “an evil and wicked person” when I would try to discuss his hurtful behavior. At the time, that was a shocking statment because I never said that nor did I think it. Years later I know better. Yes, he is an evil, wicked person and, I think, he knows it.

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