Unmasking the Domestic Abuser in the Church

The Old, Old Story – RASN’s Claim to have “Changed”

2Pe 2:22 What the true proverb says has happened to them: “The dog returns to its own vomit, and the sow, after washing herself, returns to wallow in the mire.”

As most of you know, I always tell abuse victims these two things: 1)Abusers never change, and 2) A marriage to an abuser does not need to be fixed, it needs to be ended. The wolves howl and protest loudly, accusing me of denying the “gospel.” According to their gospel, no one is ever beyond repentance and salvation. “My God is bigger than that. He can save anyone.”

That of course is false. God cannot save everyone. He cannot because His holiness will never be compromised by saving an unrepentant person. God cannot save Esau, for whom repentance was impossible. God cannot save the devil. God cannot save Pharaoh. He cannot save the apostate of Hebrews 6:4-6 –

Heb 6:4-6 For it is impossible, in the case of those who have once been enlightened, who have tasted the heavenly gift, and have shared in the Holy Spirit, (5) and have tasted the goodness of the word of God and the powers of the age to come, (6) and then have fallen away, to restore them again to repentance, since they are crucifying once again the Son of God to their own harm and holding him up to contempt.

“Christian” abusers and RASNs (revilers, abusers, sociopaths, narcissists) are not your “typical” sinner. The old mantra “but we are all sinners” is a simplistic denial of the biblical truth that some kinds of sinners are more wicked than others. More hardened. You were born, like I was, into this world as a sinner in need of Christ. As much as we walked according to the course of this world and in agreement with the kingdom of darkness, I doubt that any of you were as evil as Ted Bundy or some other serial killer psychopath. You weren’t a Hitler.

Ted Bundy’s don’t change. Hitlers don’t change. If you want to know what they are going to do, just look at what they have been doing. And so it is with the domestic abuser. They sometimes even weep and wail when the consequences of their sin come down upon them and they are about to lose the power and control they lust for, but it all remains what it always has been and always will continue to be – just another tactic to keep power, control, and mastery over their target.

Let’s extrapolate further. Hell is going to be populated. There is a Lake of Fire in which all the wicked will one day be cast and where they will be tormented day and night forever and ever. Is there any indication in Scripture (in spite of the false Roman Catholic doctrine of Purgatory) that the Lake of Fire will effect repentance in even one of its inhabitants? Think about this. If ANYTHING should be able to “change” someone and effect their repentance, would you not think 10,000 years in the Lake of Fire would do it?

But it won’t. No one cast into the Lake of Fire will ever repent. They will weep and wail about themselves and how they are suffering so. In other words, they will continue to do what they have always done. Forever.

So don’t be drawn in by the false guilting of an abuser who claims to have changed. Who says he/she is oh so sorry. Who displays “fruit” of change. The whole thing is a sham meant to keep you right where you are – in abuse.


RASNs and All Tyrants are Robbers


Bribery, The Magic Stone of the Wicked

1 Comment

  1. Bev

    Good Points!


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