The following quote was found by twbtc on Twitter recently, posted by an abuse victim. I do not know who she is and I certainly am not posting this article with the intent of being mean to her. But her words are a teaching that is very widespread among professing Christians. The churches typically teach it. Abusers love it. And it results in victims being hindered from getting free. Here is the statement:
“While God HATES what my abuser did to me, I know that he loves my abuser as much as he loves me. So much, in fact, that he died for him. I don’t like that. But, if it’s not true then the God I’m worshipping is one that I made up and I don’t want a made up God. My abuser chose…”
First of all, let me highly recommend that anyone who thinks this is true, go to our youtube site at Unholy Charade and carefully listen to the series of videos I did entitled “Does God Love Everyone?” There is an avalanche of scripture presented there that demonstrates the answer to this question is a resounding “No.”
God does not love the wicked as much as He loves His children. God does not love the wicked in the same way He loves the righteous. In fact, I propose to you that God does not love the wicked, period! In addition, it is a false statement to insist that Christ died for your abuser. Christ died for His people, for His elect (see John 17 for instance). And finally, what we have in this statement is 180 degrees out of kilter. The god who loves the wicked as much as he loves his children, the god who died on the cross for the unrepentant, habitually and characteristically oppressor of widows and orphans, is in the fact the false god.
In this commenter’s theology, it is man who does the choosing, not God. It is the sinner (who is dead to God in his sin, unable to take a single step toward God) upon whom the matter turns. Man somehow, who hates God, chooses God. As long as I still held to these ideas (because that is what I was taught) I was unable to make any sense out of the Bible.
God hates what your abuser does, and God hates your abuser. Understanding this puts you on the path to freedom.