Unmasking the Domestic Abuser in the Church

Some Common Sense from the Ananias and Sapphira Scripture

Acts 5:7-9 ESV  After an interval of about three hours his wife came in, not knowing what had happened.  (8)  And Peter said to her, “Tell me whether you sold the land for so much.” And she said, “Yes, for so much.”  (9)  But Peter said to her, “How is it that you have agreed together to test the Spirit of the Lord? Behold, the feet of those who have buried your husband are at the door, and they will carry you out.”

A wise lady sent me the following observations about this account of Ananias and Sapphira and their sin and what it tells us about this widespread oppressive teaching in churches that a wife is to “respect” her husband by remaining silent even when he is wicked:

Isn’t it interesting that Ananias AND Sapphira were questioned separately? So if she was not supposed to hide the truth about their joint decision…why should a wife have to keep hiding the truth about what the husband is really like behind closed doors? If he treated a co-worker the same it would be seen as  verbal harassment and assault. Both have safeguards under the law. Therefore when a woman comes forward she is doing the right thing by saying her husband is actually committing a crime against her. I think this is why the Christian witness before the world is so odious on this topic. It defies common sense that we would encourage a woman to stay in a situation where crimes are continuously committed against her. How is that showing the love of Christ before the world?

I think that says it all.

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5 Comments

  1. wingingit

    Except that when a woman Does get brave enough to tell what is happening behind closed doors, the church and the world and the court system very often further abuse her by not believing her, or worse accusing her as the evil one.
    I have to wonder, had Sapphira said, “It was mu husband, he controls me and our money and is verbally abusive.”
    How would the church tell the story today?
    They would say she was a backstabbing, disloyal wife who threw her husband under the bus to save her own hide.
    As long as mysogeny rules the church, women’s stories will be twisted, no matter how we tell them.

    • healinginhim

      Wingingit — An elderly pastor offered to counsel us separately. At first I thought maybe he and his wife could see what I was up against, however, when the man I married came home from his counselling he repeated that the pastor felt I was “airing out dirty laundry”. Implying that I should keep the dirt inside the home. I too, have been made to feel like the disloyal one, My comfort comes from knowing God is a witness to everything and only He can be trusted with my life.

      • wingingit

        Yes! This!
        I was accused by a “Christian” counselor of being a gossip and accused of the sin of refusing to cover my husband’s “short comings”.
        I just sat there and thought, “How could I cover them more? I wear my hair down to cover the marks on my neck and I never say a word to anybody about any of it!”

        • healinginhim

          Wingingit — So sorry to hear of your physical scars. I never had physical scars but came close to it. He was too smart for. The emotional scars are still with me mainly because the ‘church’ will not say a word to ‘him’ along with very close family members.
          Praying for you and others and for the churches and ministries like Pastor Crippen’s who finally said “enough is enough” and chose to expose the sin. They did so knowing they would receive great persecution.

  2. Innoscent

    Wow.. this gives me a new perspective on this passage in Acts. That’s gold!
    Thanks Jeff for sharing this lady’s insightful observations.

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