John 8:44 You are of your father the devil, and your will is to do your father’s desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks out of his own character, for he is a liar and the father of lies.
One of the common tactics of a domestic abuser is to lie. After all, he is of his father the devil who lies whenever he speaks. So it is the abuser’s nature to lie. And one of the ways abusers lie is to lie about the facts. About reality. To distort what happened. The goal? To convince the victim that her perceptions cannot be trusted. That she is crazy. A kind of fog is cast over the victim’s mind so that she wonders if what she saw or heard or smelled or felt was even real.
Now, still another way that the wicked use this gaslighting (as it is sometimes called) tactic is to twist and distort Scripture. For example, consider the following passage:
1Jn 3:8-10 Whoever makes a practice of sinning is of the devil, for the devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the works of the devil. (9) No one born of God makes a practice of sinning, for God’s seed abides in him, and he cannot keep on sinning because he has been born of God. (10) By this it is evident who are the children of God, and who are the children of the devil: whoever does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor is the one who does not love his brother.
There is nothing foggy about John’s words here. His meaning is clear. A Christian does not walk in sin. It is not his habit or practice. He is a new creation.
But the wicked, the counterfeit, the hypocrite, does not like such clarity. It is too exposing of their evil. So they will, if you show them such a passage, respond with something like, “you don’t know what you are talking about. Those verses do not mean any such thing.”
This very thing happened to me when I was in seminary. I pointed these verses out to a professor and asked if they did not contradict what he had just been teaching us in class. His response was “Well, John was the apostle of black and white. But not all of the New Testament writers were.” Two years later that professor abandoned his wife and children and took off with a woman he was counseling.
If you will start trusting yourself, read God’s Word as it is written, and stop filtering it through the lens of the all the false traditions we have so often been taught, you will find that YOU are in fact able to read and understand the Bible! And I think you just might be rather surprised at what you discover it to be saying, particularly about your abuser. No, it turns out, he is not a Christian at all.